UGA's hedges get police protection after attack on Toomer's Corner trees

(from MZone wire reports) Athens, GA - Note to 'Bama fans: don't even think about fucking with Georgia's hedges.

Who you calling overzealous?

In the wake of an Alabama fan poisoning the oak trees at Toomer's Corner, a place where Auburn fans have long celebrated football victories, the famous hedges inside Sanford Stadium at the University of Georgia are now under police protection.

Just in case.

The arrest last week of redneck overzealous Tide fan Harvey Updyke, Jr. (pictured at right)  for allegedly using a potent tree-destroying herbicide on Auburn's cherished trees sent a chill through the Georgia fanbase.  They've been on edge about potential harm to their own hollowed greenery - the pivet hedges which have surrounded UGA's football field since 1929.

So this week, Georgia AD Greg McGarity ordered around the clock protection for Georgia's iconic shrubbery. 

"We share a loooong border with those crazy, oversigning bastards," said McGarity.  "So we're not taking any chances.  If the police inside Sanford Stadium see so much as one houndstooth hat and a weed wacker between the hedges, I've told them to shoot to kill between the eyes."

"Put the hedge clippers down.  NOW!"